Firsts and self-care

30 Jun

Tuesday I went with a friend and colleague to get my first ever pedicure. I think the beautician was amazed at the amount of dead skin under my feet (this post is maybe not for the squeamish, just saying). And apart from being disgusting,this is probably not much to talk about. Except … my feet have a history. Kind of.

When I moved away from home to attend university, I would often feel overwhelmed and anxious, and I did not know what was causing these feelings. In an attempt to divert my attention, I would cut the soles of my feet and peel the skin off – not quite drawing blood (most days). The physical pain would override all emotional confusion – sometimes feeling as if I was walking on knives, I would make it through another day.

Over time, the scars became thick callouses.

I haven’t cut in years (and try to limit all kinds of self-harm to socially accepted forms, like getting rid of stray facial hair, and sometimes I tear my lips when I am extremely stressed), and recently I decided it was time to take care of the scars as well.

When we arrived I was afraid I would stress out – I do not like being touched by strangers even on good days. But I have to say, it was a gratifying experience. My feet are baby soft, I have lost at least one centimeter in height and am amazed how flexible feet can be without “hooves” underneath.

And now – how often does one have to repeat these things? I suck at being a grown-up woman. ^^

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5 Responses to “Firsts and self-care”

  1. georgina June 30, 2016 at 11:23 pm #

    Oh I never take pedicures or manicures or hair cuts as a matter of fact. I guess I suck to at being a grown up… I don’t remember the last time I cleaned the dead skin off the soles of my feet. I have to do that sometime.
    Thank you for sharing your story with us. It made want to hug you. So, I am sending a hug your way!

  2. peppylady (Dora) July 1, 2016 at 5:22 am #

    I’ve never had a pedicure or manicure. My nails are horrible but I thought of seeing a Dermatologist to fine out why my nails have such ridges. If a car could drive over my nail I’m affraid the shocks would ware out quickly.
    As for my skin once a week I rub my skin with a dry towel to knock of dead skin…My skin would do better if I drank more water.

    • diandralinnemann July 1, 2016 at 10:40 am #

      I am not great at skin care, either, but I try to remember my coffee rubs – smells delicious, cleans the dead tissue away and makes your skin feel smooth as a puppy butt. The only downside is the mess it leaves in the bathroom.

  3. Magaly Guerrero July 1, 2016 at 3:51 pm #

    I’m glad you are no longer cutting your soles. When plucking facial hair isn’t enough, move to nose hairs, that will make you forget about everything but crying, methinks.

    I prefer doing my own feet. This happens about twice a year, lol! Maybe thrice. My feet have been good to me when it comes to looks. You’d think that after wearing military boots and hiking and running for over a decade (not to mention walking barefoot every chance I get), they would look a bit used up. But no. They are just long and skinny and a bit wrinkly.

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